No Bad Days

““Thanks for the ride” I laughed as we reached her car.

“Yeah… now you owe me Panera Bread” Kristina retorted, feigning anger. “You know, you should really learn how to parallel park better. Then I wouldn’t have to drive you around SF.” We had just seen our last patient for the day, and we were both exhausted and hungry.

“You really haven’t eaten all day?” I asked her incredulously.

“No. Why? I’m busy” Kristina replied nonchalantly as she slid into the driver’s seat and slung her bag into the backseat.

“One sec” I said after seeing a call come in on my phone. It was the family member of a former client, Heather, who was just hospitalized and in the ICU. Her son informed me that she had a poor prognosis and asked if I would be able to visit her, as she and I had gotten along well in the past. I hung up the phone and turned to Kristina…

“Listen, can you take me back to the office? Dinner may have to be cancelled today” I told her. Kristina glanced at me with a suspicious look.

“What’s wrong?” She demanded.

“It’s my old client… she’s in the ICU. They’re saying it’s not looking good… can you drop me off at the office so I can get my car? She’s at General.”

“Okay. Let’s go” Kristina stated and started the car.
“Wait… no. I might be there a while and you haven’t eaten all day. Just take me back to the office and you can finally go eat” I pleaded with her.

“General is 10 minutes away. I can chart in the car, and Heather needs you. So we’re going now” Kristina replied matter-of-factly.

“What if I’m there for a long time?”

“Then I’ll be charting for a long time. She needs you. We don’t have time to go back to the office. We’re going now” Kristina pulled out of her parking space on the sidewalk and sped down the street.

It wasn’t long before we reached General. I spoke with Heather’s son, Ben, and he said he was waiting with her. I asked if Kristina could visit with me, and he said yes.

As we walked down the hallway to the security guard, I reminded Kristina several times that I could take an Uber back to my car at the office and she didn’t have to come with me. She replied “I’m already here. I’m not leaving you.”

As we reached the security guard, he stopped us and asked who we were visiting. We stated Heather’s name, to which he replied that they were only allowing two visitors at a time due to the pandemic, and as her son Ben was already present, only one of us could visit. Before I could even turn, Kristina was already walking back the way we came.

“Hey… just go eat dinner. Please. This might take a while” I again implored her.

“Yeah yeah yeah call me when you’re done. I’ll be in the car” Kristina shrugged.

I met with Heather and Ben in her room; Heather had a very poor prognosis, and Ben and I discussed everything from her life to her family and the pandemic. I watched the clock move from 5:30PM to 6:00PM... then 6:30PM. I texted Kristina asking if she was okay, to which she asked how Heather and her family were. I told her, and she said “Good. Stay with them.” Ben’s sisters eventually also visited, and we all caught up, grieved, laughed, and discussed the plans for Heather if she passed away. The clock moved to 7:00PM, then 7:30PM… then 8:00PM by the time we headed downstairs together.

I went into the garage, half-expecting Kristina’s car to be gone, but sure enough she was there after almost three hours. I meekly entered through the passenger’s side, expecting her to ask me what took so long.

“How is Heather and her family?” she asked instead.

“In shock but… we talked about arrangements and next steps” I replied hesitantly. “Wait… why aren’t you mad at me?”

“Huh?”

“You’ve been waiting here for almost three hours… aren’t you hungry?” I asked.

“Oh… after a while you forget you’re hungry” Kristina replied coolly.

“Well… did you finish charting?”

Kristina gave me a cheeky grin – “Not… exactly.”

“What have you been doing for 3 hours then?” I asked in exasperation. Kristina showed me her phone:

“Aren’t they pretty?!” She exclaimed.

I glance at her screen. “Shoes?”

“New Balance 327s! They’re so pretty. I ordered a pair while you were in there” she responded with pride. I gave her a sideways glance.

“What?” Kristina questioned. “They’re on sale! I can’t wait for them to get in.”

“So you’re not mad at me?” I asked again.

“Mad? For what?”

“For making you wait almost three hours for me!” I practically yelled.

“Heather needed you. Her family needed you. That’s more important” Kristina stated. “Duh I’m going to be here if you need me, especially when they need you.”

Right then I realized that Kristina truly wasn’t mad, agitated or even slightly annoyed. She knew that Heather’s family wanted to see me and that Heather and I were close; she knew that Heather’s health was declining; and in that moment, nothing else mattered. Everything paled in comparison, even waiting for three hours for me. Though she did, eventually, get to use her beloved New Balance shoes.

That night, Heather passed away peacefully, and I was able to say my good-byes to her and support her family, all thanks to Kristina.